No I don’t. I am not a “hugger.” It is often said in my presence, “oh right you are not a hugger, you hate hugs.” I began to tell myself, that’s right. Then I got thinking about it. I love hugs. I need hugs.
So why am I labelled so? Well I think I figured it out and it goes along with another one of my theories. I need hugs, and I need them for a purpose. I need them to feel secure and to take off some pressures of stress. I need to give them to tell people I am there for them in difficult times, or as a term of endearment when they have something exciting or sad happening to them. I don’t need hugs to say hello and goodbye, nor do I feel it necessary to give hugs for this purpose, although many of my friends are “huggers.”
So, my theory is this: the more you do something the less valuable it becomes. If you are getting a hug from me or I ask you for one, it has purpose and value. If there is that moment when the only thing you can think to do for me is give me a hug, then it is worth something. It is super important in that moment. It is not that I hate hugs, it is that I save them for when I need them in order to give them more meaning and value.
It matches my make up theory of, how do you every dress up if you wear make up all the time?
I do not in anyway think that my “hugger” friends have it all wrong, they just use hugs in a different way than I do and that is just fine.